They say that we swallow a ton of spiders in our sleep
Those creepy crawlers
Have formed an army in my stomach
They have a General named Hairy
And they are out for revenge
They thought that it was just a cave they were stumbling into
But as the walked slowly into my mouth
And down my tongue
And past my tonsils
They probably slid down the rest of the way
Just to be boiled in stomach acid
With no escape
But
That’s when General Hairy swings down and swoops them up
Saving them from certain death
They have a spider base along the walls of my stomach
Where he takes them after saving them
And that’s where he tells them about me
And how I ate them
He tells them that I am spider-hating-giant
And that I’ve eaten thousands of their brothers and sisters
And that’s probably true
I have eaten thousands in my sleep
When I get nervous
They start to party
And I get nauseous
I can feel them squirming around in there
And when I can’t sleep
And the shadows on my walls are dancing
I can hear them talking to each other
Whispers of their plot against me
“We’ll find a way out of his stomach
And we’ll crawl up his throat
And out of his mouth
And then
All 3,000 of us
Will bite him
And it’ll probably be enough to make him very itchy the next day
Sweet revenge!!
It’s so close!”
And some days
I do wake up
With a few spider bites
And I wonder if a few of them did manage to make it out
Or if it was one of their brothers or sisters
Who didn’t know
And was chilling on my chest or neck
Before falling into my snoring mouth
CH 12/15/23
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